Mystical experiences are states of grace when the bodymind system tunes its usual frequency to the primary field of Being, what the Pueblo mystic, Beautiful Painted Arrow, calls the Vast Self.
In that bigger field there is a vast accumulation of stored knowledge (knowings) which previously had been difficult to detect. In this morphogenetic field, as Robert Sheldrake calls it, all the past experiences of the human race are contained. To enter this expansive library of practical relationship wisdom, MDMA, sometimes, can be a gatekeeper.
Balancing this perspective on knowledge, Evelyn Underhill, a Catholic writer and pacifist, had this to say about human enlightenment: “True illumination, like all real and vital experience, consists [more] in the breathing of a certain atmosphere, living at certain levels of consciousness, than in the acquirement of specific information.”
Meister Eckhart, the medieval German mystic, spoke of us as being planted with “godseeds” and from us grow gods. We are loaded with latency, ready to spring ahead by first going back to a more complete understanding of our origins and of ourselves. That is what is symbolized by the Hopi “casting of seeds” ritual that is so important before taking the medicine. With that in mind, Jean Houston, author of
The Search for the Beloved, has outlined three major perspectives of the human experience: THIS IS ME, WE ARE, and I AM.
This Is Me is our persona, ego, or the masks we wear. It is a small, confining, constricting view, kind of like living in a cul-de-sac. It really doesn’t take us anywhere. Contrast it with
We Are where symbols, guiding archetypes, and origin myths originate.
We Are is like a more solid contact or reference point, the social or cultural container in which we can live. This realm penetrates the thin veil of the
This Is Me through fantasy, dreams, or just about any time when we let down our guard, as MDMA can help us so. You don’t have to go looking for it; you may, quite simply, open the door when it knocks. Finally, when we are connected with the Vast Self, our higher Unity Being, the solidifying and strengthening
I Am floods in.
This
I Am may feel like alien territory at first, but it doesn’t take very long to recognize it is more real, and far less fleeting, than this
middle world existence. MDMA offers an enhanced sensibility in this dimension. From watching patients enter this realm I am left with the impression that a visit to the I Am is like visiting your personal god(s).
In this field state of personal extension, there is a great concentration of familiar and reminiscent energies that can propel “individuals” to fulfill their deep evolutionary process of life – becoming their best and happiest selves, or should I say Selves – the bigger version of us.
This is what happens when you reach The Source of your being. It certainly isn’t the hospital you were born in -- perhaps some Midwestern hospital a few decades ago. This is a much more grand cosmic story awaiting our discovery.
Please don’t think of what I’m about to suggest as an unreasonable stretch. But after difficult, if not traumatic days, in this middle world of the 21st century, you may recognize a level of natural creative exuberance arising within you. Now I am reminded of Mozart (don’t know if he tried entheogens) who said of his stupendous creativity, that he didn’t know whence it came, but thanked his version of God that at least it felt very “Mozartish.”
Not only can the creative spirit of Creation arise, but I have sensed that many persons who have mindfully used MDMA in ceremony have become a stronger
moral force for good because of it. As Houston posits, humans can be seen as sacred “fetuses of the future,” currently in a redesign process. A “calling” may have been hidden in your trauma. It’s like the chronic nausea and despair of life had a message: “Enough already! It’s time to grow, big time.”
The sacred indigeneity of MDMA-assisted psychotherapy helps to build bridges from our ancient “past” to the ongoing now. For some, it can literally reorchestrate their brains and accelerate neurogenesis while altering the nervous system to a calmer and more centered existence. It may be the equivalent of altering the course of your personal evolution while also speeding it up, much like the theory of epigenetics suggests. What often arises in a series of MDMA treatments – ritualized rebirths – is an awareness of the unskilled and ineffective behaviors and choices of your prior local self. Out of the once limiting dark moments, travel on to the destiny of
I Am.
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Oh night that guided me,
Oh, night more lovely than the dawn,
Oh, night that joined Beloved with lover,
Lover transformed in the Beloved!
Upon my flowery breast,
Kept wholly for himself alone,
There he stayed sleeping,
And I caressed him,
And the fumes of the cedars made a breeze.
The breeze blew from the turret
As I parted his locks.
With his gentle hand he wounded my neck
And caused all my senses to be suspended.
I remained, lost in oblivion,
My face I reclined on the Beloved.
All ceased and I abandoned myself,
Leaving my cares forgotten among the lilies.
St. John of the Cross
The Dark Nights of the Soul
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